so before i go to sleep, i thought i would share with everyone what happened tonight.

today was our last day with the speakers, lisa and vince. they are TRULY awesome people. im pretty sure i mentioned that they have been talking on the subject " life happens" - talking about vows, sins, wounds, forgiveness, soul ties, lies, and behaviors. obviously each of the things they talked about were pretty emotional. despite that, this week has truly been life changing. i have learned SO many new things that have benefitted me, and i also know that i will be able to take the lessons home to help the people around me. each subject is significant in our lives on a daily basis. the things i got out of this week will play out in my Christian walk for the rest of my life [ at least thats what im aiming for :) ] here are some things i learned.. forgiveness is NOT a feeling. there are righteous and unrighteous judgments. (i realized how i judge pretty much everyone before i even know them as a person) WOUNDS= occur when legitimate needs are not met, or met in the wrong way. we are usually hurt by people we love. we tend to sin in response to wounds. ( SO TRUE!!) wounds can pervert our view of who God is as well as His character. wounds must be dealt with properly or they wont heal, and we will continually deal with them. SOUL TIES= big one for me. a soul tie is when the soul (mind, will, and emotions) of a specific person creates an influential or authoritative bond on another persons mind, will, and/or emotions in either a Godly or ungodly way. the way to determine if we have ungodly soul ties is to ask ourselves.. do i trust ______'s word over Gods? do i do what ______ says without praying? also, have i had sex or any unrighteous physical contact with anyone? .... those were some hard things to ask myself. i realized that for SO long i had such an ungodly soul tie. mostly everything i did was completely determined by how a certain individual in my life would react or what they would think. how dumb is that? i cant believe i actually cared more about what another human being thought over what God thought or desired for my life. it sucks to think that i actually went that far. but you know what, i am in the process of learning God's true character. who He is. how He is faithful , how He loves ME. i am learning that He desires me, no matter WHAT i do. its a mind blowing concept that i am trying to come to grips with. anyways, LIES= due to whatever reason, there are lies that we have believed in our lives. (ex.. im fat, no one likes me, God doesn't love me.) there is a source to each lie. and when we believe a lie, it takes root in our lives and has power because we have accepted it. believing lies can lead to certain behaviors. which is a whole other story in itself. so if you want to know more you can text me and ill tell you. so yeah with all of that, we were taught how to be set free from each of those subjects/things in our lives that have had power. if your interested in how to do that you can text me with that question as well. thats the summary of what ive learned all week in lecture.

today was good. every friday night our base does this thing called launch, it basically a mini church service. and the worship leader is awesome! his names donny, and he is also one of the cooks. so when i have dinner prep on mondays and wednesdays im cooking with him. he is a real man of God, and hes funny! hes dating my school leader, they make a great couple. i always play jokes on him. ill walk up and be like.. hey donny, your girlfriend told me to tell you she wants to break up.. sorry. it funny. but yeah so he lead worship and then one of the people that lives on base here spoke about missions. he did his dts here and moved to kyrgyzstan for 10  years doing mission work. he was wise and i enjoyed what he had to say. then of course we went to evangelize. there are 4 choices every week, you either stay at the base and pray/interceed, go to hotel street (a mix of harry hines and deep ellum), go to the university of hawaii, or go down to waikiki. so this week i went to waikiki, and we brought this huge sign that says "free healing prayers" (i didnt stay with the group who had the sign). i was surprised at all the other people evangelizing. i talked to a couple of people,  while you read this it would be cool if you could pray for them. one guy named billy who is 19. he believes that there may or may not be a God, but hes leaning more towards the belief that there isnt. he thinks that were just here to live then when we die nothing happens. also a guy named ken who was making balloon animals and hats. i didnt really get to talk to him cause we had to leave, but he said he wasnt very "religious" but his parents were. i asked him if he believed in God and he didnt really have an answer. then a few of us prayed with a girl whos mom just got out of jail and she wanted her to be sober. she was really sweet. so yeah if you could pray that they will hear the truth of God and that they will open up to who He is and what HE desires for them.

after we got home, the base had an optional all night prayer in our prayer room. we spent time praying, reading the Word, and just soaking in the presence of the Lord. i was having a hard time because for years i have believed the lies that the enemy has told me. so when it was like 1 in the morning i asked if everyone could pray with me against the lies that satan had told me and that i had believed. it was amazing to be surrounded by people who cared for me and my relationship with the  Lord. God really broke me and brought out all of the pain and emotions that were attached to the numerous amount of lies i had believed. it was weird cause i have never been in a situation like that, i would have never asked everyone in the room to pray for me. so even though i didnt notice it, God was with me and He gave me the strength to step out and ask for help from other believers. i cant even describe all the emotions and things that the Holy Spirit did, but i can say that i was able to speak out and acknowledge the lies i had believed, and i was able to renounce them and speak truth. my friends were also able to pray over me. ahh  all i can say is that it was an EXPERiENCE and an encounter with God. He has a plan for me and satan is pissed because God is going to use me. once i get out of this battle and step out onto the other side, i will be unmovable and unshakable in my faith. i will bring joy and truth to others around me. and the when the Lord uses me to help others, it will be genuine and REAL. so i know that im definitely at war, but God has given me the power and protection that will bring me into His will and plan for my life. im really nervous and scared but i have to step out and trust that God is with me and that He is cheering for me, calling MY name. ahh i am getting excited. 

so if you could just pray for perseverance and strength not to give up in times that i feel hopeless and alone. again keep praying that i will EXPERIENCE God's truth, that it will be real to me.

thanks for reading, im really tired.

love hannah grace